DOCKLESS BIKESHARES PROVE YET AGAIN THAT WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS

bikeshare-rogue

Who would’ve thought the age-old argument over human nature would’ve been settled by something as mundane as dockless bikeshare bicycles? The theory was that if people are essentially good and well-meaning, then they’d treat the bikes with respect and return them to their proper place even though no one is watching. On the other hand, if people are essentially bad and corrupt, they’d trash the bikes and throw them in the canal just because they can. Guess what they’ve been doing. DOCKLESS BIKESHARES PROVE YET AGAIN THAT WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS

“Inside, the entry level living room is sprawling and bright, and opens onto the outdoor patio, so if your teenager comes downstairs one night to show you a brochure for the expensive art college he wants to go to where they don’t give grades or degrees, you can take the brochure, walk outside, and throw it over the hedge into the neighbor’s firepit.”

“Inside, the entry level living room is sprawling and bright, and opens onto the outdoor patio, so if your teenager comes downstairs one night to show you a brochure for the expensive art college he wants to go to where they don’t give grades or degrees, you can take the brochure, walk outside, and throw it over the hedge into the neighbor’s firepit.”

WOULD YOU LIVE IN A FORMER FUNERAL HOME? YOU PROBABLY ALREADY DO

Yet another Petworth funeral home is set to be converted to dwellings, news which naturally makes you wonder if you’d be comfortable living in a former mortuary. We’re all enlightened people here, but at some point you’re going to be lying in bed at night and, while Netflix is buffering, it will suddenly occur to you that you’re lying in the exact spot where they used to drain gallons of blood from dead bodies. Is it superstitious to think that that sort of thing might leave a mark, metaphysical or otherwise? WOULD YOU LIVE IN A FORMER FUNERAL HOME? YOU PROBABLY ALREADY DO

“There are also two ovens, so you can feel twice as guilty about never baking, and the counters are made of leathered granite, which is a term that sounds like it would be used to describe a pirate’s pectoral muscles in those romance novels your Aunt Nancy reads.”

“There are also two ovens, so you can feel twice as guilty about never baking, and the counters are made of leathered granite, which is a term that sounds like it would be used to describe a pirate’s pectoral muscles in those romance novels your Aunt Nancy reads.”